Two years ago I didn’t value vacations. Outside of some weekend trips with Alexis, and a few day trips with the boys, vacation was not on my mind. I enjoy working; I like the daily work. The thought of leaving for a week and coming back to a pile of work or missing an opportunity while I was gone – caused just enough fear in my life that I did not want to risk leaving.

This vacation – the intentional time with the growing boys and wife – is changed that. In the last two years, we went on a week-long adventure each summer. Mid-way through this last one I am gaining clarity on what’s important and how much value a vacation can add to my life. My big takeaways this week are; steadiness and presence, supporting Alexis, a more intentional life, and trusting the team.

Steadiness and Presence. I think you show what’s important to you by where your attention is focused. Of course, none of us would say that our phones, email or social media are more important than our family, but have you ever been around someone who is more interested in getting a picture of the moment to share on social media – rather than enjoying the moment? Or maybe – mid conversation they get a text and look at their message or interrupt you to take a call (guilty and not proud of this). This trip has taught me to be steady and present for what is in front of me.

How Much Alexis Does. At this stage of life, our boys (4 and 3) take a lot of attention. We are still preparing and cleaning up from all meals; they need help using the bathroom, baths, going to bed, getting dressed, getting ready, picking up the messes, and getting in the vehicle. I know Alexis works consistently on all things relating to taking care of these boys and our home, but being around this on the day to day shows how being a mom must be one of the most demanding jobs.  A weekend at home doesn’t really capture all the work like a week together does. I am finding gratitude and love towards her for all she does to take care and raise our boys.

A More Intentional Life. Maybe it’s the natural surroundings of the Appalachian Mountains, the complete darkness at night and only the sounds of squirrels in the morning. But I am finding more peace just being rather than doing, or at least more intentional with my doing. I didn’t plan it this way, but I am only checked email one time per day while I was gone. I don’t want to share how much I check email, but when your internet connected device is in your pocket, and you are waiting in line, get early to a meeting, or are just curious; I can tell you where my time went. With my attention on the kids, hitting some spots where we didn’t get reception and trying to be present with the family it just didn’t happen, and then I realized how much less frazzled I felt. How much more intentional my day could be. Rather than reacting to what is happening – I could be more intentional with my time and focus. I realized my email was not serving me but rather taking away. It was taking away my ability to purposely pursue what was truly important for something that was urgent. Communication As Service is a company value and that still means I get back to people, I stay available and willing to serve. I am just going to be more intentional with my checking and responding.

Trusting The Team. Either by habit or excitement, I seem to jump into every situation or problem at work and try to fix it. This might get me excited and feel great when I come up with a good way to navigate through a change, but it limits the team. My absence allows other people to grow. It allows other people to think though things without me jumping in. A vacation with limited check-ins helps me to trust the team and build confidence with themselves to learn, grow and expand.

Take More Time Away. Vacations, or just time away from routines and schedules, are valuable. This time away has me thinking a bit different; I think a better way. My focus is re-aligned, and I am ready to get back to work, but not without first having my next trip planned. I am going to be intentional with spending time away with my family. It doesn’t have to be expensive, and I can plan it out. I can’t think of any reasons other than fear that would keep us from taking more time away. In the short term, it may seem like too much time away from work, but it’s in this time away that my work gets focused, intentional. I get to be the dad and husband to my family, while our team at work has more opportunity to grow themselves. I think it’s a win-win.

Heard. Watched. Read.
  • A 1-minute leadership nudge from David Marquet. Fix the environment, not the people.
  • Podcast Interview with Larry King. I was intrigued by his curiosity and story.
  • A short 6-minute file with Jim Carrey showcasing the artist and genius-ness of him.
  • “The Bible offers a tremendous amount of insight into how we as Christians should work: We should work with excellence, integrity, diligence, and graciousness.” – C.S. Lewis And The Call to Create